HS Comments on the Fly

	Not noxious!

It was a tall and pretty thistle plant that I was admiring when someone drove up, jumped out of their car without putting it in park (it kept rolling a bit), and told me that I needed to cut it down because it was a Canadian thistle and a noxious weed. She was very vigilant. And motivated. I was taken aback. I told her, sweetly, of course, that it was the national flower of Scotland and that I wanted to see it bloom first. I assured her that I’d make sure that the flowers didn’t turn to seed. She seemed somewhat mollified. However, I wasn’t.

I took to the internet in a fact-checking frenzy. My daughter and I eventually identified the plant as a Scottish thistle which is not a noxious weed in this state; it is in some others, though. The Canadian thistle is a noxious weed in this state, but our lovely flower was most definitely not a Canadian thistle. There are a number of obvious differences between a Canadian thistle and a Scottish thistle.

I’ll admit it, though. It is rather weed-like. But it’s not noxious, so we can cultivate it if we care to. It did turn out quite nicely. In England, you can buy a Scottish thistle bush and plant it in your garden. Obviously in a land overrun with gardeners, there would be fewer noxious weeds.

Anyway, you can see that big bulb on it, can’t you. We didn’t think that you could press the flower like it showed William Wallace doing in Mel Gibson’s Braveheart. So, we cut one and put it between some leftover bricks. You can see the results. That big ol’ bulb flattened right out. But look at the bloom! It lost all of its delightful color! So, I think that I found an error in the Braveheart movie. William Wallace’s pressed thistle supposedly retained its color, but I think it was due to movie magic instead of botanical science. Just a guess.

	pressed, colorless thistle

I looked on YouTube for Braveheart clips that included the thistle, but could only find a clip of young Murron picking the flower and giving it to young William at the funeral of his father. Her picking the flower is amusing since picking a Scottish thistle is not as easy as she makes it look. It’s extremely prickly, which my daughter and I found out when we tried and succeeded in bringing in a bouquet. And it did take both of us to cut and handle the stalks. And yes, it did hurt. I imagine, judging by its prickles, that it’s not meant to be picked.

Flower of Scotland is about the thistle. Can you believe there’s a song about it? I found it out when searching around YouTube for the above-mentioned clips. It’s my understanding that the “Proud Edward” mentioned in the song is Edward II who fought against Scottish King Robert the Bruce in 1314. He was the son of Longshanks if I’m understanding it correctly. Here’s a link in case you want to hear the song. I guess that it’s sung by Scots before rugby games. There are tons to YouTube clips of that.

Wow, can you believe some partiers in France punched a 4-inch hole in a Monet? Rather shocking. This article gives a good view of the actual tear along with the actual size of the painting. It’s a rather small painting, if you ask me. The title of the painting is Le Pont d’Argenteuil (The Bridge at Argenteuil).

So what can be discussed as a result of this news story? Oh, lots of stuff. Who Monet was. When he lived. What Impressionism is. Where Paris, France is. What river flows through Paris. And, of course, the possible results of getting tipsy in Paris during Nuit Blanche — an annual all-night musical and cultural event. I guess it could read like this: Bottle of French wine, $6.74, Admission to Orsay Museum, $10.53, Ripping a hole in a Monet … Priceless.

I couldn’t believe it when I read that the famed (possibly notorious) Northwest Passage had been opened up. What would Captain Cook, Sir John Franklin, and Henry Hudson, etc., etc., etc., think?!?! Wow! But yes, it was open earlier this year as revealed in this BBC article (map inc.). I know you probably already know about it, but we found the info of interest … what was it? … about a month ago now. And to think that Hudson, Franklin, and Cook, etc., spent so many years searching for it. Without them what would Turnagain Arm or Hudson Bay be called? Did Franklin name anything after himself? If he did, I don’t know it about it. All I know is that he died somewhere up near Nunavut.

So now Canada, the US, and the UN are fighting over the Northwest Passage. Should we expect anything less?

Canada says it has full rights over those parts of the Northwest Passage that pass through its territory and that it can bar transit there.

But this has been disputed by the US and the European Union.

They argue that the new route should be an international strait that any vessel can use. (from above article)

Canada and the US are also engaged in a dispute over the future of the Northwest Passage, the partially frozen waterway that links the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.

The US says it regards it as an international strait but Mr Harper [Canadian PM] has vociferously defended the passage as Canadian territory.

He has already announced plans to build six naval patrol vessels to secure the route. (source)

Lastly, the new theory about the appendix is startling. You know, how they always say that the appendix is useless and unnecessary. Well, now they claim that possibly it’s used by the body to repopulate the large intestine with healthy intestinal flora after illness, that the appendix reboots (so to speak) the digestive system. Cool, huh? It sounds reasonable to me.

So, what can we discuss after reading this article with our students? That good bacteria live in the intestines. We can look up the appendix in the Body Atlas. Learn the warning signs of appendicitis. Learn about cholera and dysentery … not exactly a light-hearted subject. And that drinking drinking fresh water is important.

So, that’s three subjects touched on: Art, History/Geography, and Biology.

I remember while growing up thinking after a certain age that it just wasn’t cool to color anymore. But that was in the olden days. Now we’ve got these coloring books that claim to be “… suitable for both the college and health professional students….”

I’m talking about the The Anatomy Coloring Book and The Physiology Coloring Book. There are other topics covered by these coloring books. I’ll see if I can find some others.

Yeah, I found these:

• Gross Anatomy
• Gray’s Anatomy (see inside the book)
• Botany (see inside the book)
• Zoology (see inside the book)
• Biology
• Microbiology

I’m not sure if I agree with the pedagogy supporting this form of learning. That much coloring would fry my brain. I don’t think I’d suddenly understand the function of the rods and cones in the eye by coloring a picture of all of them.

However! That’s just me. My daughter can’t believe she’s getting credit for coloring and seems to enjoy it. Plus she’s able to give me a reasonably well formed explanation of what she has colored when she’s done. So … Re Sult!

For the curious, she will not be coloring either of the books in their entirety. That would be overkill. She’ll color until interest lags or she’s not able to pass my tough, but not obvious, evaluation procedure.

And on a lighter note … did you see where The Foil Hat Chick called the Bluedorns “kind of insane” yesterday? I am amused.

I’m sure you’ve already heard the big news.

Yes, Senegalese chimps are sharpening sticks with their teeth and then hunting bush babies and eating them.

I think this is the funniest article about it. Best sentence:

I saw “Planet of the Apes” and know where this is going.

Another, more serious article tells us that human beings and chimpanzees share 98% of their DNA. Most baffling sentence:

Chimps are known to use tools to crack open nuts and fish for termites.

Sure, I know that most people wouldn’t find it befuddling, but I did the first time I read it. After reading it, I thought, “But there aren’t any termites in fish.”

I would have understood it more easily if it read:

Chimps are known to use tools to crack open nuts and to fish for termites.

Or maybe I just needed labels over the nouns and verbs in the sentence like all good grammar textbooks provide.

Don’t miss the article from the Scotsman which tells us that the female chimp’s name was Tumbo. Snidest comment after the article:

So what were saying here is females can be cold blooded killers when they want to be……….what a Revelation

Ha.

The National Geographic article has links to video footage showing the hunting chimp. This article probably gives the most details. You know, stuff like:

The tools, on average, are about 24 inches (60 centimeters) long and 0.4 inch (11 millimeters) around.

The researchers refer to the tools as spears. Pruetz said they differ from throwing spears, in the sense that they are jabbed into tree trunks and branches, not tossed.

As for animals using tools, let’s not forget the shrikes! They are like the noisiest birds — at least the ones around here are. They have a good use for barbed wire.

[Shrikes] feed mostly on larger insects, like grasshoppers, but also small vertebrates such as mice and lizards. Some species impale their prey on thorns or barbed wire for later retrieval. Their rapaciousness is legendary.

And cows! Even cows use tools to groom themselves.

He found they spend about 3% of their day grooming and preening themselves….

They mainly use their tongues and hind hooves to groom the rear end of their bodies, Kilgour says.

But they also use inanimate objects like trees, branches, fence posts and stumps to get at areas they can’t reach, he says.

“They’ll walk up to fallen tree limbs which have protruding branches and groom around their eyes,” he says.

So, there ya’ go.

I have no idea how to teach plant care. And there are no tutors. But I wouldn’t pay for one anyway because it’s cheaper to just go out and buy new plants every two months.

I really liked my polka dot plant. It was pretty and pink, but not in a Molly Ringwald sort of way. I bought it last November. Now I pity it. I’m distressed every time I see it and wonder if I should Kevorkian it.

Problem: I torture plants unto death.

Solution: Unknown.

Question: Who do I blame this problem on?

Answer: My K-12 education at the hands of classroom schools paid for by the taxpayer because, of course, this is a skill that someone should have taught me. They should teach plant care starting at age 6. Every classroom could have 10-20 houseplants, you know.

Additional Problem: I am incompetent at teaching houseplant care to my homeschool students. Failed one already and am focusing all my energy on remaining student by modeling desperate plant-torturing behaviors while calling it “feeding and watering.”

Solution: Unknown.

What should lovely polka dot plant (hypoestes) look like? Here’s a bunch of flickr photos for you. The ones with the pink dots on the leaves … that’s the kind I have. Isn’t it the happiest-looking little plant?

Where’s the homeschooling curriculum that teaches plant care? Hmm?

Additionally, why are there no 12-step programs anywhere for the plant torturers?

The local florist and plant store is awfully kind to me and gave me the recipe to get rid of spider mites — mites that they helpfully provide with each plant they sell, it seems. So I have learned that recipe and can pass on that knowledge to my students and can bask in the glow of that smallish sort of accomplishment. But at what cost? I killed eight English ivy plants in the process. One survives in my kitchen on my little shelf by the north window. It’s nearly reached the grand age of one year.

Anyway, if you’ve successfully grown a polka dot plant in your home, have got the time, and want to save a green life, please advise me.